Kevin would always post pictures of his cat, and if he didn’t invent Friday cat blogging, he sure perfected it.

So here’s my kid’s cat — Pearl. This is from a couple of years ago where she had a stint at our house. That “Smarty Kat” branding is for the toy, not the cat. She’s quite dumb, I’m afraid to report. She’s also a bit of a misogynist (not kidding). Guys are in. Gals, she’s not so certain about.

I’ve learned from Pearl that either indoor cats aren’t super smart, or maybe this particular cat isn’t. Pearl’s never been outside, and her world is the four walls of wherever my kid is living. We always had indoor/outdoor cats at home. They were just hunting and killing machines who roamed the neighborhood at night and came back with pieces of cat claw embedded in their fur from vicious fights. For them, it was a harsh existence that they seemed to crave. For Pearl, anything outside of the front door is a mysterious land of fearful monsters.

That all said, she likes me when I visit because I’m male and I give her good treats.