New blood

I was listening to an interview with Ta-Nehisi Coates and he said he has no apolitical friends. He has no friends who “secretly think Donald Trump is great”. He said “people say you should have those, but I disagree - I think my life is richer without them”

I was thinking about that as I get ready to sell our house and leave this very Trumpy small town and I too think I have reached that point - I am just no longer willing to listen to the Right wingers in my book club or in my husband’s tennis and pickle ball groups defend Trump. The truth is I’m horrified they’re sticking with Trump as we lurch towards fascism, and I believe doing so shows poor character and a lack of ethics (and common sense).

Looking back, I think maybe a big part of my retaining these friends and acquaintances was tied to either the law office or my children as they were growing up. Many of my clients were Right wingers and it doesn’t make much sense to alienate 75% of potential clients by rejecting them based on their political views. Too, my children were growing up here and I didn’t want to alienate 75% of the town because that would have repercussions for them in school, among their friends, etc. In other words, I don’t think I, personally, was getting much out of these relationships - they were transactional. It’s a relief to let them go.

I am aware, however, that I have the very privileged option of just packing up my car and moving. That is not true of many of the working-class Democrats and liberals here that I am leaving behind. They’re doing what I did for decades - looking for like-minded liberals to join forces with to stay sane and attempting to change hearts and minds.

There’s a newer, younger group who have formed since the last election. They call themselves “DEEDS” - it’s an acronym and I know two of the words are “diversity” and “equity” but I don’t remember the rest. They’re sort of unaffiliated liberals but obviously they vote for Democrats. They' started a Substack - it’s called “Voices from the Fields” and it’s for rural, red state liberals.

I wish them all the luck in the world and hope like hell they’re better at it than I was. I spent 30 years on it and this town went further Right every single one of those thirty years.